I love my family. I really, really do. But I have a confession to make. I don’t like cleaning up after them. At all.
I know that some women actually enjoy this. Taking care of their families. They find joy in the simple tasks of taking care of their family, cleaning up after them. Lots of them are very happy stay at home mommies that get paid in hugs and kisses. I think that’s great.
And actually I’m a little bit jealous because I wish I enjoyed it at least a little bit because then it wouldn’t piss me off so bad when I hear, “Moooommmm, I need you….” Because that sentence right there let’s me know I’m in trouble.
This weekend there was mess making of epic proportions at my house. Here are a few examples:
- Pee accidents, from the kid and the dog
- Milk that had a tiny hole and leaked all over the outside refrigerator (After I cleaned it up David told me he had dropped it, but thought it was alright. He was wrong.)
- A whole tube of toothpaste that got squeezed out all over the bathroom
- Poop, lots and lots of poop
- A sample size bottle of cleaner that got spilled all over the kitchen table and everything on top of the table
- Water splashed all over the bathroom
- A giant glass of water that got spilled all over the kitchen table and everything on top of the table
- A milk cup knocked off the bar and spilled all over the floor
- A cup of soured milk in the bathroom (don’t ask me where it came from because I have no idea) that got knocked over on the counter and spilled all over the counter and the floor
That is what I remember. I’m sure there was more. And of course all of that is in addition to the normal stuff I have to do like load the dishwasher and make sure we all have clean underwear (because God forbid someone can’t find their clean underpants at my house, or their socks, oh the freakin’ socks).
And you know what I get for coming to the rescue with a dry rag to wipe up a spill in one hand and a clean pair of undies in the other? Nothing. Nada. Zip. Not even a thank you.
I know that my family loves me, and I *think* that they are thankful for everything I do for them, but I don’t KNOW that they are because they never, ever tell me. I don’t think a simple “thank you” would make me like housework, but I do think it would help me not be pissed off so much when I have to do it.
What about you? Do you fall into the Suzy Homemaker category or the OMG-I’M-GOING-TO-KILL-THESE-PEOPLE-IF-I-HAVE-TO-CLEAN-UP-ONE-MORE-THING category?
I couldn't possibly agree more. Everyone wants to cook, but no one wants to clean. No one wants to ask for help BEFORE disaster strikes. And you are in no way exaggerating about the drawers. Oh, I can find y'all some drawers…look on the floor in front of the shower. Just wait until those little cuties are teens and taller and stronger than you. What they are saving their strength for, I don't know.
Thank you. I always feel so guilty about hearing one of my kids yell for me to do yet another thing for them.
I just started saying "you're welcome" every time I think I deserve a thank you. I can't say it's helped, but it at least lets them know I expected a thank you from them.
Oh I could have written this post. I agree with you, I am there with you in spirit and soul….I have been parenting for almost 25 years and I am hear to tell you *teach them now* to do for themselves what they can reasonably manage at their given ages….because it doesn't miraculously change later. I say this from *vast* experience. Take good care of yourself mama!
When I fill my youngest's plate for dinner, I hold it till he says thank you. Most nights, I don't have to hold it long.
But I get that. I'm the mother, not the maid, dammit.
For example, my oldest told me this morning that it was MY fault that we had to wait for the coffeemaker to brew a second pot since I'd forgotten to add grounds to the basket last night for the first pot. I told him that if I didn't have to do EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME, I probably wouldn't make that mistake. He appologized for the comment and was allowed to live.
Seriously, I get it.
TOTALLY the latter. I secretly suspect that the women who "enjoy" it just really like to be martyrs (*cough*MIL*cough*).
Seriously, before we had a kid, hubby cleaned up after himself okay. Why am I suddenly the default housemaid just because I'm the only one in possession of a vagina?
Did you sneak into my brain and write this post? Definitely one of the I-AM-GOING-TO-KILL-THESE-PEOPLE … people right here!
My husband told me this morning that his bathroom was revolting and needed to be cleaned. HIS bathroom. It took such restraint not to shove his head in the toilet.
I feel this way a lot. Especially after spending 3 days on my hands and knees cleaning grout and the whole house WHILE I was sick so that my house would be clean so we could celebrate my birthday. What's wrong iwth that picture? And what do I get when I'm done? People throwing their crap all over the house, not even respecting how much time and effort I put into making the house nice. I can't even get backed up by my husband because after the 8 year old he is the worst offender.
I HATE cleaning up after my husband. The Boy is different, he's 9 months and can't help the mess he makes, but Gadget Guy is nearly 36 and I can't stand it when I have to clean up after him.
Being a Mom is a thankless job!!
Happy Valentine's Day!
Girl! You took the words right out of my mouth, except mine are 16 and 13, and highly capable of doing these things for themselves.
It is a constant struggle for me to have a positive attitude about what I need to get done. I know this is where I should be, I know that I shouldn't be doing anything for praise/recognition, but I still want it. My house currently shows my frustration with this whole issue. And since I'm babysitting a couple of kids Wednesday that are not used to our mess, I guess I better do something about it. I do feel better when my house is clean and I'm going about my tasks with a cheerful attitude, I just have a hard time getting there and staying there.
How sad but true that a Mom's job is mostly thankless
Before I was expecting my daughter, I never even came close to wanting to be a stay-at-home Mom, mostly because I HATE housework! It's not that I don't do it, or can't do it, I would just rather do something else with my time. I do like the tip about saying "you're welcome" to reinforce the Thank You's. My hubby has recently started telling the kids to talk more respectfully to me, which is nice. Now if I didn't have to be his Mom too most days…oh well, I just to remind myself that I do have a blessed life even when the day to day can be a pain 
Happy Valentine's Day and thanks for being a good Mom! There are lots of the opposite out there!
I don't like picking up after my family especially since it seems like it is messy again right after I cleaned up.
The beauty is that my oldest two are actually starting to be able to do some of the cleaning themselves. For example today I had my 11 year old to unload and load the dishwasher and my son always is on garbage patrol and also started his own load of laundry. So it is getting a little better – even though they do drive me crazy when they say "but mom I really just wanted to relax, you never let me relax" seriously they say that.
My hubby I can't even talk about. But to his credit I knew he was a slob before I married him (the apple doesn't fall far from the tree – MIL) I can only hope he learns by example.
Just know that all us other moms appreciate what you do everyday for your family even if they don't!
You're kidding, right? Who the frackity frack are these people who enjoy cleaning up after the pigs in their house? They are insane. No, they are robots.
It is definitely a thankless job. I get really down about it sometimes. Don't mean to get all Polyanna on ya, but when I get REALLY down about it, I just keep repeating, "God is happy with me. He is proud of me. He is thankful I am taking care of my family." etc. I feel a little better knowing that God is pleased. It would be nice to get a pat on the back, but seems like I never do!
I am definitely in that second category. My biggest pet peeve right now? When they walk away from breakfast in the mornings and leave their bowls on the table. I get tired of being expected to clean up their messes and then add the dog and her messes to that…not good.
I stay perpetually pissed at my husband and two teenagers because they WILL.NOT pick up after themselves. I let it go as long as I can and then when I can no longer stand the mess, I clean, yelling and cussing and screaming the entire time. Just this past Sunday night, I nearly hit my 17 year old with a broom while he slept because his puppy tore up some trash and he left it so he could go to bed. Thankfully, I refrained from bashing him with a broom, but I woke him up with my yelling. GRRRR